So The Snuggery is Not Just a Bar in Chicago

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March 5, 2013 4:05 PM by Smash

Screen Shot 2013-03-05 at 3.31.56 PMWell if this isn’t the creepiest profession than I don’t know what is. These two women have a business getting paid by people to snuggle. Here’s the genius behind The Snuggery:

Jacqueline established The Snuggery because she believes in the healing power of touch. The Snuggery is a place to take a break from the hustle and bustle of life and focus on the simple restorative pleasure of touch. Though science has unquestionably supported the psychological and physical benefits of non-sexual touch, Americans distinctly lack it. It’s time for change. At The Snuggery, Jacqueline provides individuals with private snuggling sessions. She aims to make the world a gentler place, one snuggle at a time.

Obviously the FAQ is the best part, highlighted by what has to be the most common question:

Q. What if I become sexually aroused during my session?
A. Don’t worry, it happens! Although sexual activity is not permitted, arousal is perfectly normal and should not make anyone feel uncomfortable.

So boners can just fly all over the place and that’s fair game? Call me crazy but couldn’t you just find a boyfriend or girlfriend to snuggle with? Then the whole “no sexual activity” issue is tossed out the window.

My biggest issue with this is the lack of talent at The Snuggery. Could you imagine how much money they’d make if they were actually attractive? Someone needs to Hooterfy the Snuggery. Six figures would be a cakewalk.

But the REAL issue is how have these 2 not been killed or kidnapped yet? Sure they meet with the client first and what not. But anyone can put on a nice front for a few minutes. Shit, John Wayne Gacy met First Lady Rosalynn Carter back in the day:

Rosalynn Carter John Wayne Gacy

The obvious move would be to hire a massive black man as your security guard or just stands there while you get your snuggle on.

Sidenote – How do you tell people you snuggle for a living? Also, isn’t that essentially the minor leagues of prostitution? These are the questions to think about.

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One thought on “So The Snuggery is Not Just a Bar in Chicago

  1. Gerald says:

    John Wayne Gacy,…CLASSIC

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