Looks Like A Lot of People Have Burning Pee in Chicago

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February 28, 2013 12:45 PM by Smash

Screen Shot 2013-02-28 at 11.58.15 AMChicago Mag – The expansion of sex ed in Chicago schools is not a bad thing, but this brought me up short:

Dr. Stephanie Whyte, chief health officer for Chicago Public Schools, presented statistics showing that Cook County ranks first nationally for rates of gonorrhea and syphilis among all counties and second in Chlamydia.

Not sure what data she’s got; that’s not exactly what the current CDC data say. Cook County has the most total cases of gonorrhea of any county in America—which isn’t good, considering it’s the second-biggest county. But it doesn’t have the highest rates of infection. Not by a long shot. Our rate in 2011 was 209.1 cases per 100,000.

There’s significant geographical variance in Chicago as well. The disease tends to cluster in certain areas. Using data from the city’s data portal, I mapped the rates per 100,000 people. The data is reported for men and women separately, so the final number is an average of the two. And not all community areas have reported data. But look at how drastic the difference from one part of town to another–the infection rates range from a low of 71.7 in Lincoln Park to 2,654 in West Englewood.

Jesus Christ. Get your shit together Chicago. Murders, gonorrhea, murdering people with gonorrhea. Chicago can’t catch a break right now. Well people are banging that’s for sure. What I don’t get is the areas that don’t have any red in them. How is that possible? Bunch of virgins living there? Well Lincoln Park makes sense but the all the other areas are throwing a curveball at me.

gonorrhea-map
Although, looking at the map of the US, I guess at least we’re not the South. Holy shit. I’m guessing that’s because if one member of the family gets it, it’s obviously going to get passed to the rest of them? Has to be.

Wrap your shit up guys. No one wants burning pee. Can’t say I’ve ever had that but what guy hasn’t gotten some soap in there at some point? If the burning is the equivalent of that, no thanks, I want absolutely no part of that.

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