Abercrombie & Fitch Closing Stores; Douchebags Soon to Be Out of Work

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February 25, 2013 10:16 AM by Wade Blogs

abercrombie-and-fitch6Huffington Post – Abercrombie & Fitch, the Ohio-based teen retailer, plans to close 180 of its U.S. stores by 2015, CEO Mike Jeffries told analysts on a conference call Wednesday.

Unlike its flagship in New York City — where buff men in minimal clothing lure shoppers around the clock — many of Abercrombie’s 1,014 U.S. stores are under-performing, tucked away in the empty hallways of aging malls. Apparently, you can’t just stick shirtless models outside of every store.

By closing unprofitable locations, Abercrombie hopes to elevate its brand image as well as its profit margins. The 180 stores announced today are only the latest in a string of closures: last year, Abercrombie closed 71 U.S. stores, including 68 during the busy holiday shopping season. The company did not specify where the new closures will occur.

Welp, Abercrombie and Fitch plans on closing 40-50 stores across the United States. Oh boy am I excited by this! The article is for the birds unless you know finance and such. But get this, there are probably something like 12 people working at a given store. They’re hired for being douchebags with their shirt off and luring customers into a store that blasts shitty music and pumps terrible cologne through the vents. 12 x 45(avg) = 540 people out of jobs. Normally I wouldn’t celebrate people losing jobs or the closing of an establishment but is there anything more pretentious than A&F? Seriously, the clothes cost an arm and a leg and go perfectly with a visor tilted to right of left eyebrow. Hopefully this is the beginning of the end of their douchebag rep and they change their brand to something of quality.

Sidenote – Was there anything hotter than a girl in high school wearing an A&F or Holister mini skirt? Talk about HOT.

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One thought on “Abercrombie & Fitch Closing Stores; Douchebags Soon to Be Out of Work

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