Woman Assaults Boyfriend After Taking the Last Beer

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December 7, 2012 1:15 PM by Smash

Vanessa Robinson Mugshot

Huffington Post – Vanessa Robinson was charged with aggravated assult after she allegedly cut boyfriend James Gallone multiple times after he tried leaving her apartment with the last beer — a Colt 45 to be specific, according to WPXI-TV.

The alcohol-oriented altercation started brewing last Thursday in Hempfield Township, Penn., when Gallone — who reportedly had purchased the beer — decided to leave, according to Trooper Steve Limani, of Pennsylvania State Police.

“The person who purchased the alcohol says, ‘I’m leaving;’ goes to grab the beer that he had purchased. The female was arguing with him that, ‘you’re not taking the beer,’” Limani told KDKA-TV. “It ended up becoming a physical altercation.”

Can’t say I blame Vanessa Robinson here. Taking the last beer is such a power move. You know you’re gonna do it, you guzzle down that last one so you can have it, and you expect no one to be upset about it.

At the same time, he bought it? That last beer is technically his. Hell, every beer was technically his. You don’t like it Vanessa? Go to the store and grab your own.

Worst part about this story if you know they were drinking some sort of ice beer, Red Dog, or anyone of the million other shit beers. You know how I know that? Poor people physically fight over the last beer. That is a fact.

For anyone who says they should have just split it – get out of here. You don’t simply split a beer. On that note – you know what’s worse than splitting a beer? Splitting a single piece of gum. One of the worst moves a person can make. 11 times out of 10 I’ll tell them to just have it. Shit disintegrates instantly. Not worth my time.

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