General David Petraeus

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November 13, 2012 9:00 AM by Wade Blogs

I know all have you have been awaiting our thoughts on General Petraeus’ affair with that broad Paula Broadwell.  I am sure we are going to get new developments with each passing day and the truth will come out by Friday because we all know the truth comes out on a Friday.  Friday is the day you hear the breaking news so you buy the Saturday paper.  NO ONE buys the Saturday paper EVER because the Sunday paper is the meat and potatoes of the week.

Anyways General Petraeus is a diesel human being.  Man runs 5 miles each and everyday to start his day and can probably rep out tons of push ups, sit ups, and pull ups at age 60.  His wife is the daughter of a former West Point Superintendent, where Petraeus went to college.

So Davey Boy was trying to raise through the ranks, married this broad to boost his rep at an early age.  Little did he know that he was going to NAIL IT on all fronts and become a General.  Once he got some notoriety for his service to his nation he started fooling around with some younger gal.  Do you blame him?  Have you seen his wife?

The first thing I thought of when I heard about this story was the Sandlot line…

“He was lucky she hadn’t beat the crap out of him.  We wouldn’t have blamed her.  What he’d done was sneaky, rotten, and low… and cool.  Not another one among us would have ever in a million years even for a million dollars have the guts to put the move on the lifeguard biographer.  He did.  He had kissed a woman.  And he had kissed her long and good.  We got banned from the pool CIA forever that day.  But every time we walked by after that, the lifeguard biographer looked down from her tower, right over at Squints Gen. Petraeus, and smiled.”

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